Life is Filling with Win.

Life has been good to me, as of late.

The job search is still looking a bit dismal, though there are possibilities and tantalizing maybes and all sorts of almost half-realized plans just out of my grasp. My applications have largely ground to a halt; I’m down to perhaps an application a week as I try to wait patiently for other people to field the balls that are in their court. However, as people know, I am not the best at patience, but I promise promise promise that I’m working on it [at least with regards to the job hunt].

I’ve been hanging out with a totally rad group of queers that largely consists of people I’ve met through KNT, The Queertastiks, and Femme Mafia [the connective fiber between the three being  Cherry Poppins]. I think that I’ve been asked which name or pronoun set I prefer more times in the past two weeks than I have in my entire life, and it is simultaneously the most wonderful and frustrating thing ever. It is wonderful because people care. I mean, they genuinely care, and are willing to accommodate me. It is frustrating in that I don’t know how I want to be accommodated, is all. Female  pronouns don’t feel right, but male pronouns don’t feel particularly right, either. Gender-neutral pronouns are my favorite in that they are the least-uncomfortable, but I understand that some folks either don’t like or can’t handle using gender-neutral pronouns. And I understand that. I understand that some [my family] will never use anything other than female pronouns, and that some others may never use anything other than male pronouns, because that is easier for them.

I have taken a posture regarding my name and pronouns that I’m sure many see as a cop-out. I see it as staying in-line with my affinity for ambivalence and for acknowledging the [partial?] construction of reality by each individual for each individual. I find it to be quite fitting, if at times infuriating. So far it has been going well, especially as it manages my expectations regarding individuals’ actions, and keeps me from getting frustrated or upset relatively effectively. It combines my favorite M3 metaphysical recognition of the whole person with my subscription to Meredith O.’s idea of Level Five Thinking, to so-far-fantastic effect.

Everything else is looking kind of exciting, too. Possibilities for the nearish future are opening up. There’s a chance that I’ll end up working on some more jank-ass Boalian theatre of the oppressed, which I didn’t realize that I’d miss as much as I do. There’s an invitation to enter a whole new realm of fandorkery. [Alright, there's always been the invitation, but now there's a chance I'll actually take it up.] There’re opportunities for new interactions with new people. There’re opportunities to try new things and challenge myself and grow and learn and communicate and all that jazz. And I’m excited.

…I just need a job so that I can take advantage of some of these other opportunities without going terribly broke.